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"An honourable, obstinate, truthful, high-spirited, intensely prejudiced, perfectly unreasonable man."

The Lives We Lost (Fallen World - Trilogy)

The Lives We Lost - Megan Crewe She should have just stopped after the first one. The writing is all over the place. It's way too simple and there is absolutely no consistency. Also the entire plot's flat, there's barely any rise and she also got rid of my favourite character. Next Stephenie Meyer? I think so.

The Constant Princess

The Constant Princess - Philippa Gregory Absolutely compelling to see what Katherine/Cataline went through in her life. Philippa Gregory has a very unique writing style and can weave together a great story while still remaining somewhat faithful to the original histories. But boy was Katherine annoying. No wonder Arthur died just to get away from her.

The Virgin Suicides

The Virgin Suicides - Jeffrey Eugenides From the beginning you know that all five of the Lisbon sisters are going to die -- but that doesn't stop you from reading this beautiful masterpiece with its lush language and magnificent prose.

The Handmaid's Tale

The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood A story set in a near-distant dystopian future where a totalitarian Christian government has taken over and taken away all of women's rights (or so I understood). It follows the idea that sex is only for reproduction and when wives are unable to reproduce they are assigned a "handmaid" who produce for them - as a large portion of the population has gone sterile (including men, however the women are blamed and punished for this). Our narrator is a Handmaid, Offred (Literally Of-fred). In this society a Handmaid takes on the name "of" followed by the name of the patron figure of the household they are assigned to. Her real name is never disclosed, however hints it to being "June." At first, Offred is a very apathetic narrator. She simply does not care about the present and makes lots of references to the life she lived before she became a handmaid. She also refers to the words of "Aunt Lydia" - a member of an agency which teaches women to be Handmaids - quite a lot. We learn a lot about the world from Offred - such as the singing of public domain songs is forbidden, that she had a brief affair with a man named Luke before he divorced his wife and marrying her - however she focuses on details a lot. Why does she focus on details? She focuses on details in her narration as a coping mechanism; she wants her old life back but there is absolutely no way of that happening. She hates the life she leads now and loses herself in the immense detail of her surroundings to escape the reality she's living. Throughout the entire novel she thinks about Luke, she tells us how she and Luke attempted to leave the country using fake identity and papers but they were subdued - which is how she came to be a handmaid. However she's so lost in the thought of Luke and her past to the point where when the driver of the household she's assigned to makes a sexual advance on her she deludes herself into believe that she's kissing Luke in the body of Nick (the driver). She sometimes even tries to convince herself that Luke is still alive and will come to rescue her, even though this completely contradicts her suspicion of Luke having been shot upon their attempt to leave the country. But as all dystopian novels go, there is always a conspiracy to discover. And of course Offred discovers them - and you can see where all this goes. But this novel is different, it doesn't end like all of them do, the last 100 pages are completely unexpected of a dystopian novel. But they are beautiful, as are the rest of the pages in this book.

Perfect

Perfect - Ellen Hopkins My friend gave me this book for my birthday. And at first I was like, "Perfect" ? When I read the first chapter I expected it to be a self-help book about not committing suicide, and at that point I was wondering WHY my friend would give me a book about a teenager contemplating suicide. But as I read on I learned it wasn't about suicide, it WAS suicide . . . okay, that sounded much better in my head. It was beautiful, compelling, and riveting. It brought tears to my eye and I... I just... I just... I can't even ;o;

Daughter of Smoke and Bone

Daughter of Smoke and Bone - This book is weird. It's really weird. But it's equally as awesome. Karou is a girl in her late teens who lives in Prague (of all places, this book takes place in Prague). So she seems like a rebel. Also she has blue hair and is constantly stalked by her stalker ex-boyfriend. Did I mention she has blue hair? Also she likes to escalate things quickly in her mind. Her best friend Zuzanna (who is constantly left behind because she's simply too human) was flipping through her sketchbook in one scene and the scene went something like this: Zuzanna: Your sketches are so weird but I less than three them so much. Karou: Thank you! (Aside) Little does she know they're all real muahahahaha! I was like. Wait... Backtrack, motherfucker did you just say all your sketches are real? Well that escalated quickly. And then we're introduced to the extremely weird world of the Chimeraes - these half-human half-animal creatures - and it just gets weirder and weirder from there. Apparently these chimeraes need teeth for some odd reason which isn't really explained at the beginning, so you're just sitting there like 'wut...' And so Karou gets these teeth for the Chimeraes - one in particular, named Brimstone - and it isn't exactly explained why. Just that Brimstone and his fellow shopkeepers, Issa and Twiga have been looking after Karou since she was a wee little lass. Also, there's this entire wish process where one can wish for anything they want but to an extent. There are different levels of wish granting thingies (can't remember the name) and they each grant a certain level of wish, and come at a price. The price for granting wishes isn't really explained at the beginning either, but Brimstone is constantly shaming Karou for having wasted wishes on selfish and vain things - which kinda hint that the price is severe and kinda a big no-no. And when you learn the price you're like "WAIT. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT IS THE CONNECTION I DON'T SEE IT WHAT I CAN'T EVEN" but then you're like "OH, I GET IT." Also there are these angelic beings called Seraphim and they're constantly at war with the Chimeraes. And Karou gains another stalker (this time a Seraphim) when she goes to retrieve teeth from this grave-robber in Marakkesh because the supply in Brimstone's shop is running short. And then mysteriously everything in Brimstone's shop burns down and this messenger bird named Kishmish shows up at Karou's house all burned up. Akiva (Karou's angelic stalker) shows up in Prague to find Karou, and the entire thing quickly spirals into a love story - but unlike other love stories this has some realshit twists that leave you thinking 'wut.'What I liked about this novel is the extreme weirdness of it at the beginning, but as you progress you become comfortable with it and you learn to even expect the weirdness. I also like the relationship between Karou/Madrigal (Spoiler) and Brimstone, and the way they show it coming to be such a strong father-daughter type relationship. I also like how they kinda jump back and forth with the scenes explaining Madrigal's past towards the end. It's all woven together quite nicely and layered intricately. I highly recommend this book for... anyone, really. I'm really excited to read the sequel. Also, Laini Taylor has pink hair. I respect that. A lot. You go Glen Coco.

My Sister's Keeper

My Sister's Keeper - I don't think I'm in any emotional state to say anything to anyone or say anything about anything or even show myself to the world for the next few weeks because of this book. I'm going to go crawl under a rock and cry out my feels now.

First Day on Earth

First Day on Earth - Cecil Castellucci This book is really bad.This author is a try-hard.This story has too many holes.This story has no character development.This story makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.This kid needs a one-way ticket to the psychiatric ward. This story has way too many provocative questions for its own good.This story is just really bad.But the cover's nice to look at.

Warm Bodies (Warm Bodies, #1)

Warm Bodies (Warm Bodies, #1) - Isaac Marion I liked this book better when it was called "Romeo and Juliet."

The Way We Fall

The Way We Fall - Megan Crewe *** FORGIVE GRAMMAR AND SPELLING, THIS IS A RAGING, RAW, STRAIGHT-OUT-OF-MY-HEAD-RIGHT-AFTER-READ REVIEW *** Actual rating: 3.5/5 First of all, I would like someone to explain to me what the fuck it is that I have just finished reading. In other words: The book was great, it was amazing, I thought I was going to give it a full five stars until the ending came. Don't get me wrong, I actually liked this book, I actually enjoyed it. Which is more than what I can say for any other book I've read in the past few weeks. Up until the 250 page mark, I couldn't put this book down and then Kaelyn started showing her bratty teenage self. In all honesty, I think it was a good add on, showing how a teenage would really react to any situation, but then she became a cold-hearted shell. First of all, she clearly has none of her priorities sorted. Does she want a boyfriend or does she want to save her family ( Or what's left of them anyway ). And who does she care more about? Her boyfriend or her friend? This is shown when all she can do is talk to "Gav" when Tessa's pissed as shit with her and she just lets her stay in her room. Normally letting people cool down is a realization that comes after someone tries their level-best to talk it out with them. But no, instead Kae just lets Tessa run into her room and shut the door behind her and rarely talks with her. Their relationship does get better towards the end, but guess what she walks home one day and sees Tessa making plans for planting, and makes tea; so everything is somehow magically fixed. Girl, if it were that easy to reconcile with someone then I would be making tea everyday and have all the friends I've pissed off back, but that's now how it works. And the fact that Kae, the bitch, has this weird obsession with this kid named Leo whom she hasn't seen in a while, and she's writing to him in the form of a freaking journal just means that she's this crazy lunatic. Or maybe she's not writing to him, and she named her journal after him. Yeah, that makes it ok (not really). All in all, this book was disappointing. Which is a shame because I went into it thinking I was going to absolutely hate it, but then I actually started liking it towards the middle, but then "Mortality" came and everything went downhill from there. Things I liked about this book 1. Gordon Weber, Kaelyn's dad. I imagine him being played by Anderson Cooper if this ever gets adapted into a film. Gordon is practical, but I guess the only reason he's portrayed as the practical adult is because this book was actually written by an adult. Which would explain why the teenagers in this novel were so fucked up and the adults so practical. 2. Tessa, the level-headed best friend whose always calm. Unlike Kaelyn Tessa is actually grateful for the things she has and focuses on those things only in order to stay calm; whereas Kaelyn is always freaking out and trying to save the day.3. Meredith, because who doesn't love a little seven year old? She's the beacon of hope in this novel, or so I'd like to think. And I love the beacon of hope.4. The portrayal of the teenage social hierarchy. 5. Lots and lots of tea and plants.6. Kaelyn contracts the virus Things I didn't like about this book 1. The writing style. It could have been so much more dramatic in first person. Putting it into third person really limited the effect the character's words and reaction would have on us.2. There were barely any vivid imagery. It's almost as if, just because we live in the world, the author expected us to know what the world looked like. 3. Everything happened way too fast. People started believing in the virus way too fast. I remember when swine flu struck my community didn't even believe it until someone within it contracted it. So I guess the reader response depends on reader experience.4. Kaelyn could have been a really kick-ass character, but instead she turns into a heartless shell.5. There was no sense of surprise! Everything was predictable!6. Kaelyn survived the virus. I thought she was going to die, like that would have been so much better. I love it when authors kill off the protagonist and the narrator. But no, she fucking survived Now for the only part I'm excited to write about: THE CASTING! I'm not even going to bother with Kae, I hate her so much. Gordon Weber: Anderson Cooper Tessa: Isabelle Fuhrman Gav: Logan Lerman! Yeah, I'm shallow; deal with it.

The Silver Linings Playbook

The Silver Linings Playbook - Matthew Quick ** RAW ** I definitely liked this book much more than I ever thought I would. Pat Peoples' view on life is definitely interesting and kinda like mine: always look for the silver lining, because there will always be one. Pat was kept at a mental institution for four years after he bludgeoned a man whom he caught fucking his wife in the shower one day, but he thinks it's only been a few months and is shocked to see that so much has happened in 'just a few months.' But that's not where it ends, no. Nikki, Pat's wife has gotten a divorce with Pat, remarried and gotten a restraining order against Pat for what he did but Pat thinks its 'apart time' and when apart time ends he and Nikki will reconcile--And that's Pat's silver lining, that he and Nikki will one day be a member of the 2.5 WPF club. But what Pat doesn't know is that his silver lining comes in the form of a young widow named Tiffany, who is severely depressed. After Tiffany's husband died she went and slept with a whole load of people whom she worked with, which resulted in her losing her job. Tiffany takes a liking to Pat from the very start however Pat still believes that if he forms any non-platonic relationship with Tiffany it would be adultery, therefore he pushes away any of Tiffany's advances. However Tiffany makes a deal with Pat that he would be her partner at the Dance Competition and Tiffany would make a special thing happen. What I didn't like about this book was the ending. It was too fast, and left at a point where nothing even made sense anymore! I also didn't like how Tiffany was portrayed towards the end. It made her seem so demonic, and made Pat seem like a little victim in her game. But I liked the writing style. The use of no-contractions whatsoever really added to the feel, it really let us take a deeper look into Pat's psyche. Much like The Perks of Being a Wallflower this book explores mental issues such as depression and bipolarity and a lot of traumatic events and triggers. In both books, the narrators are unreliable and they start out as very immature (as seen through the writing style) however they mature as the novel progresses and their narration gets better as well.All in all, a great and quick read! But sadly... The movie was better.

The Great Gatsby

The Great Gatsby - F. Scott Fitzgerald I re-read this book last night (in order to be well-equipped for the Gatsby Garden Party I will be attending this Sunday) and (not only came up with something smart to say in this review at last but) had a few revelations. This book really stuck with me because I developed a very special relationship with the text itself. I realize how shallow I was when I first read it. This book isn't about love. It's about the idea of being in love. As in, Gatsby isn't in love with Daisy. He's in love with the idea of loving Daisy. He doesn't want to form a relationship with Daisy either. He has this imaginary perception on how he wants their relationship to work out─the way it was when they had first met. Gatsby doesn't want a new relationship with Daisy, no. He wants to re-create the relationship he's formed with her in his mind, and put it into real-time. Yes, Gatsby wants to love Daisy, but he also wants to turn back the time to when he did love Daisy. He wants that love and wishes to recreate it, and he's been living through that relationship in his mind all his life to the point where he isn't in love with Daisy anymore─as she's a completely shallow, money loving trophy wife─he's merely in love with the idea of Daisy, with the idea of loving Daisy, with the idea of loving one so shallow and vain. Tom isn't in love with Daisy either. He's in love with the idea of having a wife. He's in love with the idea of a 'trophy wife.' Just as Nick isn't in (platonic) love with Gatsby either, he's in love with the idea of recreating yourself, the idea of simply choosing a new identity and living a life based on the connotations that identity is given by society, by yourself, and by the entire human race. That's why this book stuck with me. See, in order to love the Great Gatsby you have to be in love with the text, the prose and especially the messages and hints behind the text. I suppose. But Fitzgerald's true message is hid in the last lines of the book (Or so I perceived it): Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that's no matter—to-morrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther. . . . And one fine morning——So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past. Part of Review where reviewer rambles on about nonsensical things I guess the reason as to why people may hate this book is because they had to analyze it at school, or something along the lines of that. Fortunately, I live in Canada and here we focused on 'Canadian Literature,' so I particularly enjoyed this. Although, I wish we did studies on American Literature here too, American literature is so much cooler than Canadian Literature. (But that's just my opinion). Part of review where the reviewer can't think of a proper way to end the review WELL. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? GO TO BOOKSTORE. BUY BOOK. OPEN BOOK. READ BOOK. YOU'RE WELCOME.

Love the One You're With

Love the One You're With - Emily Giffin Normally I'm not a big fan of Chick-fic, but hey.These authors know my life way too well.

The Devil Wears Prada

The Devil Wears Prada - Lauren Weisberger My future life, I'm just saying.

Inside Linda Lovelace

Inside Linda Lovelace - Linda Lovelace ...I...has...nothing...to...say...except...eye-opening...

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button: Soon to be a Major Picture

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - F. Scott Fitzgerald DA FUQ DID I JUST READ.